Bittersweet Day

27 years ago today, my dad passed away. Today, at 9:00am we saw our baby's heartbeat for the first time. I can't help but think that the two are connected. I have felt such tremendous love through our fertility process and now I actually feel like there's an unseen hand (attached to big muscly arms that gave great hugs) that is helping us as well.
Levi is 100% sure that we're going to name our baby Gordon if it's a boy. I'm still on the fence about that one....I'm not sure we'll cool enough to pull that name off yet :) We are absolutely ecstatic for this child, and I know I must really be pregnant because I've already thought, "Wait! Are we sure we're actually ready to have a child??" As if these last two and a half years of trying to get pregnant didn't happen. LOL!
Thank you to everyone who has helped us through this process, whether it was an encouraging email, a hug or even a donation towards our fertility process. You are all so amazing and this child will most definitely know how much everyone cared.
Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!

"Our lives are in danger, you beatnik!"

I couldn't think of what to name this post and my brother Scott and I have been quoting the movie "Clue" a lot. So there you go.

It's been a, um, interesting week :)
I'll post more about that after 11:00am on Friday *wink wink*
Mostly this week has been dominated by what I call, "The Dining Room Table Drama." I fell in love with a mid-century modern dining set at an antique store and did something totally out of my nature: impulsively bought it, without taking ANY time to think it through. Anyone who knows me knows that for the past five years I haven't had an impulsive shopping bone in my body. All pleasure I got out of shopping has long since died. Or so I thought. I bought this dang dining room set on a whim, sold our fantastic butcher block table and four ikea chairs on Craigslist for next to nothing (by the way, if you want to know if you priced something too low, the answer is apparent when you receive sixty phone calls in less than eight hours.) Anyways, with our old table and chairs gone and the new table in, it turns out that I don't like the dining set. In fact, I HATE the dining set. The word "hate" doesn't actually begin to cover it. Much like an incident involving my sister Laurie and some red brick, I am physically ill when I see this inanimate object. (Again, this physical nausea is related to the news that I'll be more inclined to talk about after Friday, but is still very real whenever I see the table.)
This week did have some fun points too. A couple of days ago, we celebrated my belated birthday with my in-laws. Avery and I have birthdays two days apart, but with the wedding and everything else going on, we didn't get to celebrate with the Gates clan. We had some amazing BBQ at Brad's house and then we watched the DVD with the wedding photos on it with Chris and Avery. It was a great night.
Work has been interesting. As some of you have probably heard, B&N is in the midst of a buy-out and it's been a little bit weird. I'm confident that we'll be alright, especially since we're the only B&N in western Idaho, but it's still scary. I'm just trying to think positive and hope that the best will work out. It just has to.
My mom has had a bad week and any prayers that anyone could say for her would be very appreciated. Her back, which has always had issues, has been especially bad this week, reaching it's worst point yesterday when Laurie had to take her to the emergency care because she couldn't even walk. She's taking lots of meds to help with the pain today, and she's hoping to get into a doctor tomorrow to get a shot that will block the pain to the nerve in her back. I really hope and pray she can be seen as soon as possible and move on past this pain. She deserves better and I hate hearing her down like this. Again, if anyone reading this can just keep her in their thoughts it would be very appreciated.
Well, I better go. I have completely neglected doing any sort of laundry this week and it has finally caught up to me. I almost reached the "Wearing-swimsuit-bottoms-as-underwear" point, but I found an old pair under a pile of socks in my drawer. Success! I'll probably wait until Friday to update again. Until then I hope you all have a wonderful week!

Avery's Wedding

Last Monday, (8/9/10) Levi's little sister Avery married her long-time boyfriend Chris in a gorgeous ceremony at the Idaho Botanical Garden. It was one of the most fun weddings I've ever been too, everything from the ceremony itself, the dancing, the previous day's BBQ rehearsal dinner at Chris & Avery's house, the weather, etc. Just a great day!

Social Distortion

Last night, Levi and I saw Social Distortion play and it was as good of a show as I've ever seen them play. Seriously, those guys only get better with age. Mike Ness looks so good, there must be a portrait aging away in some attic in southern California, because that man does not look any different than he did ten years ago. Any band who can cover Johnny Cash, Rolling Stones, Kitty Wells, and so many others, as well as write some of the best original rockabilly/punk is just fine in my book.
Everything was great, except for the part when Levi and I were just enjoying the show and two drunk girls started fighting in front of us and threw beer all over us. That was fun, let me tell you.
They played all of my favorite songs (actually, they could have picked any of their songs and they would have been my favorite.) I especially liked them playing "Making Believe" and "Reach for the Sky".
If you have a chance to check them out, I highly recommend it. I hope to take Ryan one of these years (and we'll make sure we're not next to the drunk, fighting chicks!) No cameras were allowed, otherwise I could have got some great pictures we were so close to the stage.

Here are two of their best songs:




Oh yeah, here's an acoustic version of Bad Luck that's on a DVD that we have. I love it!

Update coming....once my camera wakes back up.

My sister-in-law Avery's wedding was PERFECT. It was such a great day and I'm so bummed that my camera's battery died before I could get all the pics uploaded. I'll hopefully have them up by tomorrow.
It was a magnificent day and Avery and Chris are going to have a wonderful life together. I love them both to bits and pieces.

The Horrifying Incident of the Bird in the Night-Time.

I am forever traumatized.
A couple of nights ago, around 10:30pm, I hear Levi yelling downstairs at our cat Oliver, who was outside in the backyard at our sliding glass door. Then I hear him yell at our dog, "Eww Buster! No!" Oliver had brought a little bird home with him, which is gross enough, and then Buster had grabbed it and chomped down on the poor thing. Levi grabbed the bird and threw it over our fence, into our front yard and came inside to tell me about it.
I asked if if the bird was still alive or not and he said, "I'm sure it's dead. There's no way it lived through that." Well, I knew better than that and we went out in the front yard and found the poor thing still alive and totally immobile. It was the saddest thing I'd ever seen. The little guy was beyond traumatized and I burst into tears. I got a shoe box and filled it with paper towels and scooped the bird into it, until we could figure out what to do.
In Boise, there's a place where you can take birds who have been injured and they'll either euthanize them or treat them, if their injuries aren't life threatening. Of course, that place is not open at 10:30pm, so we called a 24 hour vet to find out what we should do. They said they would take care of the bird for us (euthanize it) but they're office was pretty far from our house and the bird was suffering. They asked if we felt comfortable, "humanely putting it down" ourselves. Levi's face went totally pale and he told them that he didn't have it in him to kill a bird.
At this point, I was a blubbering idiot and I knew that we had to take care of the bird ourselves because it was in a lot of pain and I didn't want it to suffer while we drove to the vet's office. (I know a lot of you are probably laughing right now, since anyone who knows my zoologist Grandpa Allen knows his various methods of quickly and painlessly putting animals down. The gene that allows a person to calmly put an animal down did NOT get passed to me!)
Needless to say, Levi and I solemnly discussed our options and the various methods we could do it. Sparing you the details, let's just say it all ended in the back alley behind our house, with me behind the wheel of my car, sobbing, as I drove quickly over a plastic bag.
It was a traumatizing night and one that I hope will NEVER be repeated. I couldn't even look kitty Oliver in the eyes for two days, I was that mad at him. Ah, the circle of life.

Redfish Lake and a busy, busy summer!

A week ago we went to Redfish Lake and had an amazing time. My mom came up to Boise on Thursday, we left early Friday morning and came back Sunday evening. It was absolutely perfect (with the exception of the random rain delay, which caused us to have to wait a couple of hours before we could go to the beach.) We ate like gluttons, got lots of sleep and took in plenty of sun (well, I did. Levi likes to hide under his little beach umbrella.)
After we came home, my mom and I went around town getting her ready for her move up here next month. She got a new account set up at a local credit union, found a storage unit and lots of other move-ready details. We can't wait to have her here! Now we just need to get rid of our couch and cushy chair to make room for her sectional couch, which is much, much better!
A couple of weeks ago, Levi's mom moved back to Boise from Texas with her new husband Leo. Maria is such a sweetheart and it's fun to think that she's just down the road from us again. With Zane's mom moving here from San Jose a couple of months ago, the trifecta of mother's moving to Boise will be complete!
The last couple of weeks have been filled with getting ready for Levi's sister Avery's wedding. She's marrying Chris, her boyfriend of over three years, and we're so excited for the big day. Levi is performing the ceremony (with a license that was done through email, thankyouverymuch!) It's going to be a great day and Avery will make a wonderful wife! We bought Levi some new dress clothes and I think he's going to look sharp. I made him buy a vest because I think vests are awesome on guys, especially Levi. The dress that I bought a few months ago for the wedding is way too big for me now (a good problem to have, I suppose) but I'm just going to have to make do. I shopped around the mall yesterday to see if there were any dresses on sale and I have never seen so many ugly things in my life! What happened to the style out there!? Heather took her kids school shopping yesterday and said the same thing. The styles these days are just not flattering on anyone, and I'm not sure why stores keep stocking their racks with ugliness. Oh well.
Well, I'll try to keep the blog posts updated. It's just been a crazy, busy summer and it will be nice to relax when it's all over (although, the thought of fall and winter in Boise make me want to cry. Can we say Seasonal Affective Disorder!?)







P.S. Yesterday we celebrated Wilson's birthday at Heather's house, because he will be at Redfish Lake on his actual birthday next week. We had Wilson's favorite dinner (DELICIOUS pasta w/ chicken and cream sauce) and watched him ecstatically open his presents. Happy Birthday Lil' Wil!


(If you want to make a little boy happy, get him a Leatherman!)


Levi liked Wilson's new toy! Levi got his Red Sox tattoo touched up yesterday, hence the shiny plastic on his arm.


Eliza got cute new school clothes and I absolutely love this sweater!

Happy Birthday Mom!

Tomorrow is my wonderful mom's birthday. On Thursday, she'll be coming up here and we'll be going to Redfish Lake for the weekend. To try to name why my mom is great is pointless: there are just too many things. She is my best friend, my psychiatrist, my cheerleader, and my source of entertainment. She's tough as nails, but she's also one of the most tender-hearted people out there. She says it like it is, but she's always got my back. Everyone needs someone like my mom in their life!
Happy birthday, Mom! We love you so much!

This will always be one of my favorite pictures.

Luck is on my side!

For some reason, luck has seriously been flowing for me this week! Nothing big, just a bunch of little things that have added up and made this a great week.
First, since I started my diet a month and a half ago, I rarely eat out anymore. This has been very kind to my budget and I found out yesterday that I've saved up a nice little amount by not eating at Wendy's every day!
Second, I was excited that I had extra money to pay on our fertility bills, so I called the Idaho Center for Reproductive Medicine to see what the damage was and make a payment on it. Turns out, we have a CREDIT there! A REFUND!! I can't believe it. My insurance kicked in and we had already made a few payments, so it turns out that we overpaid. This never happens to me.
So since I didn't have to pay the IRMC, I called my regular OBGYN and was nervous to find out what our total was there too. The lady who took my payment told me that our entire balance was only $47. What?? I totally thought it was more. I think the same thing happened with them: we had been making payments all along and then the insurance kicked in. Woo hoo!
So now I really had money burning a hole in my pocket, so I took a trip to the mall. I found an adorable skirt at Maurices that was on sale for $16. I liked it a lot and decided it was worth the money. The girl rang me up and it turned out to only be $6.98! Woo hoo again!
A new store opened up in the mall that sells cheap clothes and accessories and I decided to look there for a new wallet, since mine split in half (literally.) This new store had some of the cutest wallets I'd ever seen for only $10. I picked one out and then saw the sign that said they were 2 FOR 1! Yes! This made it possible for me to get my sister-in-law Avery an extra little birthday gift. I couldn't believe it!
At work this week, we found out that our store had won a region-wide contest and every employee got a $25 gift card. It's seriously been burning a hole in my pocket. I can't wait to pick out free books!
All of this luckiness has been fun and I find myself being thankful for so many little things: the great weather (yes, I know it's hot, but I love the heat), my loving husband, my amazing family, Levi's awesome family, my car that runs every day and has never had a single problem in the four+ years we've owned it, my house and the air conditioning that works exactly when I need it to, the fact that we're going to Redfish Lake in one week, etc.
I hope this lucky streak continues!! (Now if we could just transfer some of this good luck over to the Red Sox. Those guys need a BIG dose of good luck. I've never seen so many injuries and such a rapid descent.)

In other news, Levi's friend Conor came from New York to stay with us for a few days. We had a great time with him and we (and the dogs) definitely miss him.
Levi's mom Maria and her new husband are moving up from Texas this week and will be living about a mile and a half from us. We love Maria so much and I'm excited to be able to see her more often!
My mom will be here in a few days for the trip to Redfish Lake and while she's here she's going to get ready for her move here (getting a storage unit, setting up a bank account, etc.) We are so excited to have her too!
Well, I need to get going. I'm going to clean up the house a little bit and then head over to the pool to work on my tan :)

Sevy, Avery and me eating yummy mexican food before seeing Inception again.


Avery at her bridal shower.


Sevy taking pics at the bridal shower


Levi's friend Conor. Our neighbors thought we had Levi's brother staying with us.


Morty and Buster were fascinated with Conor.


Levi thinks he belongs with all the 80's and 90's hasbeens.

Wow.

Good heavens. Inception was so much better than I thought it would be, and I thought it would be amazing. It blows my mind what a great director Christopher Nolan is. (On a side note, I found out today that he was only 29 years old when he directed Memento. That both inspires me and depresses me. 29 years old! What will I have done with my life in one year that could even come close to what he had done by then?)
Anyway, I cannot WAIT to see Inception again. I enjoyed it more than any of his other films (except The Dark Knight, which I loved equally as much as this one.)
I love a movie that ends with the audience gasping and applauding.
Go see this the minute you have the chance! (Seeing it in Imax was definitely worth the extra $5 per ticket.)


Inception Trailer - Watch more Funny Videos

PS Joseph Gordon Levitt BETTER have a role in the next Batman movie. Preferably he'd be The Riddler, but I'd take him as any character. He's that good. The scenes of him in zero gravity in the hotel are unbelievable.

Awesome trip home.

Last weekend we skeedaddled down to Utah and had a blast! I hardly got any pictures (as usual) but we had an amazing time with the family. On Thursday night, Scott and Stephanie had a birthday BBQ for me at their house. We had delicious cheeseburgers and yummy cupcakes (nice job Cassidy and Whitney!)
On Friday, we went out to dinner with Curt and Bonnie and my mom to Buca di Beppo. It's a wonderful, kitschy Italian restaurant that serves its food family style and is covered floor to ceiling in tacky italian photos and memorabilia. It's great. Thank you so much, Curt and Bonnie. We had a blast!
Saturday was Carl's wedding and it was a beautiful event and I'm so proud of him. We spent the rest of Saturday hanging out, watching Ryan's baseball game, eating yummy food and working on my photo project. I was able to send a ton of photos of my grandparents and our ancestors to Walmart to be printed and they turned out fabulous! Grandma and Grandpa were such a great help with the names and dates and it was fun to hear stories of ancestors and of my grandparent's dating life. We had a blast!! We were sad to come home on Sunday, but luckily we got to see Scott, Stephanie and their girls before we left and we had a delicious dinner at Laurie and Justin's. When we left I was crying buckets, a sign of a great trip. I miss you all and can't wait to see you in September!!

My cute nieces at Scott's house. We had so much fun!


Handsome Ryan


Enjoying the "Pope Room" at Buca de Bepo's.


Yummmmm.


My beautiful grandparents.


The twins at Carl's wedding.

Five, count 'em, five years!

Today is my five year wedding anniversary with Levi. I can't believe how fast the time has gone, and yet I can't believe we've only been married five years: it feels like we've been together for much, much longer than that.
In the past five years we've experienced living in three homes: a crappy duplex, a nicer (but still kinda crappy) apartment and finally a home that we bought in 2008. We've acquired two cats, lost two dogs (RIP Dutch and Lola), acquired two more dogs (regrettable and enjoyable, all at the same time.) We've bought one new car, been on countless trips to Utah, seen four Red Sox games (all of them in Seattle), been to Redfish Lake four consecutive years (in a couple of weeks it will be the fifth!) We've had two miscarriages, cried millions of tears and have decided that even just one child would be absolutely divine. We've kissed thousands of times, said "I love you" ten thousand times and have laughed out loud at each other a trillion times.
These numbers are a drop in the bucket of my memories with Levi. While discovering we were infertile, I was forced to find something positive about the possibility of never having children. I found that I will always have a deep appreciation for every minute spent with Levi. Most couples with children only get to really be with each other a couple of hours a day, and that time is often interrupted. Levi and I have the opportunity to spend uninterrupted time together every single day and we truly do relish this. We enjoy walking around downtown, going for bike rides, seeing tons of movies, watching Red Sox games, going out to eat, and going for a drive for no real reason. Of course we can only hope that one day we'll be able to share all this with a child, but in the meantime we're really enjoying each other's company.
Infertility has also been a real blow to my ego. I've always thought that being a great wife meant being able to procreate with your husband. Having that piece missing was like losing a piece of myself and I couldn't imagine that Levi would want to be married to someone who couldn't give him a child (especially since he's the only son, he's the oldest, etc.) but Levi has never made me feel like a failure and has said numerous times that he's happy to spend the rest of his life alone with me. That has given me such a peace of mind and I'm able to feel a little bit better about our situation knowing that he's always going to be there for me. What an amazing man.
Levi has seen me through the best of times and the worst of times and throughout it, his devotion and loyalty to me never once wavered. If I'm having a bad day at work or I'm bored at home, I know that Levi is only a phone call away and he ALWAYS answers when I call. The fact that I've only heard his answering machine a handful of times speaks volumes. He's always ready to listen to me complain, ready to cheer me up when I'm down, and ready to laugh with me when I'm telling him a story.
Levi, these five years of being your wife have been the best five years of my life. I'm a better person because of you and I appreciate your willingness to be my best friend, my personal cheerleader and my husband. You are the absolute best. I love you!

Busy, busy.

I haven't been this busy for as long as I can remember. I haven't even been able to upload all the photos that were taken while my sister Laurie was here! Boo.
Laurie and her four darling girls came up last Wednesday and stayed until Saturday. It was a blast having them up here and our house seems to quiet at night without the sounds of girls giggling in our guest room. On Wednesday night Laurie, Heather, our friend Andrea and I got to see the outdoor production of A Midsummer Night's Dream at the Boise Shakespeare festival. I would have loved to take pics of the play, but it was strictly prohibited. It was an amazing production and the swinging 60's clothes mixed with the Beatles music made it all the better. Thanks so much Heather! What a great early birthday present!
The funeral for Grams was on Friday and it was a beautiful service. We went to the rosary vigil on Thursday night and then Friday I worked for a few hours and then went to the funeral. Levi and all the other first-born boy cousins were the pallbearers. He did a great job and looked handsome in his suit. My father-in-law Brad gave a very touching talk about Grams' life and there wasn't a dry eye in the place. Grams was buried next to her husband Harold in the beautiful Morris Hill cemetery. After the burial we went the open house at the downtown Red Lion. The place was packed with family and friends and we had a great time visiting with everyone.
Saturday was Levi's stepmom Julie's birthday so we went to her sister's house for a little get together and ate some yummy cheeseburger sliders. Also on Saturday night Heather hosted her famous (at least in the east side of Boise) block party for the fourth of July. It seems to get better with each passing year. Neighbors come over to her front lawn and we feast on cheeseburgers, hot dogs, chorizo, salads and many, many desserts. It means a lot to us that Heather does this each year and I'm so disappointed in myself for not charging my camera's battery because I only got a couple of pictures (which I still haven't even uploaded!)
Well, the busyness never ends. I have to get ready for work and then start getting ready for our trip down to Utah to see my good friend Carl get married. We leave on the 8th (our anniversary and my sister-in-law Avery's birthday), the wedding is on the 10th (my birthday) and then we'll come home on the 11th. I hope our pooches survive without us for four whole days!!
Here's some pics of the past week:

The outdoor theater where we saw A Midsummer Night's Dream

I think Andrea could be our long lost fourth sister!

I took Laurie and her girls, plus Wilson and Eliza, on my favorite walk.


Levi and some of his cousins. The altar girl in the background cracked me up. She was wearing bright pink Converse high tops with her altar girl robe. Super cute.


Avery and Chris at the reception after the funeral.

Brad and Julie at the reception.


Unfortunately I didn't get a picture of it, but Sevy helped make an amazing picture board for Grams' reception. It had dozens of pictures all throughout Grams' life and it was a big hit at the reception.